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What It’s Like to Feel Guilty About Every Purchase You Make
How a bad financial situation ruined my relationship with money.
For the past decade, my parents have struggled financially. There are days filled will stress, hopelessness, and days when one of my parents cries.
Our bad financial situation fucked up my relationship with money. For a while, I hated it. I didn’t want to make it, and I believed it was evil and the root of all of our problems.
I know that’s not true anymore. It’s the lack of money that screws you over.
If we had more of it, we could get our own home, my parents, their own room, and we’d buy a car rather than using my grandparents’, which abnormally sways.
I’ve fixed a lot of my issues with money, but not everything. I still get shocked when I see people spend money without care. Not in a reckless, dumb way, but in an I-don’t-regret-what-I-buy kind of way.
Sometimes, I’d go out with friends, and they’d buy random things they liked — a mug, a cute shirt, or stuffed animal.
I never bought anything, and it wasn’t because I didn’t have money.
I feel guilty about every basically every purchase I make.
